Positive memories

Cases of positive memories of erotic relationships and contacts of children with adults, as seen from the perspective of the former minor

T. Rivas, 2009

Ipce is a forum for people who are engaged in scholarly discussion about the understanding and emancipation of mutual relationships between children or adolescents and adults.

Ipce has given me the opportunity to publish this collection of positive memories of intergenerational relationships and contacts of children with adults. Many of these cases are derived from other collections with the collectors' permission, for which I'd like to thank them.

In general, we see that positive child love relationships really occur in all combinations:

	1. Boy-Man (38 stories)
	2. Boy-Woman (4 stories)
	3. Girl-Man (22 stories)
	4. Girl-Woman (9 stories)

I have added a fifth category which I call

5. “Loose Contacts.” (17 stories)

This category refers to contacts that occurred outside a significant love relationship, simply for the sexual gratification of both partners. This phenomenon deserves respect, but it is quite different from a romantic relationship.

Together 90 stories.

The primary focus of the book is on relationships with erotic aspects rather than on sex as such. I have included this fifth category simply to show that some sexual contacts can be consensual and harmless even outside the context of a larger relationship.

These stories are followed by a Discussion.

My central thesis is that 'pedophile' relationships, i.e. horizontal affectionate relationships between a minor and an adult outside the child's family, should be judged on their own individual merits rather than on the basis of the sex or age of the child.

My main criteria for including a particular case in this collection are:

	the relationship was voluntary, i.e. consensual from the child's subjective perspective;
	it was positive, meaning that the child did not experience it as ambiguous, let alone negative, in any important respect;
	the person reporting the experiences (the former child) is nearly 18 or older;
	the older partner was 18 or older during the relationship; the adult was so much older than the child or teenager that even many 'liberal' people would nowadays consider the relationship inappropriate. For example, a relationship between a person of 18 and a boy or girl of 15 is not included, but a relationship between an 18-year-old and a 12-year-old is.
	it did not involve sex with siblings or parents;
	the person recalling his or her experiences as a child has not developed a pedophile orientation or preference for relationships with minors;
	the former child does not have a criminal record as a sex offender and
	The child was not paid for any sexual services.

All of the cases included have an erotic aspect. So far, I have not included any purely platonic cases yet, but I would like to do so in the future, when I find retrospective reports by former children of such platonic relationships.

Taken together, these cases clearly appear to establish the following facts:

	There are consensual and harmless erotic relationships between children and adults.
	Many of these relationships involve friendship, affection, and personal love.
	They can start even before the child is twelve years old.

Positive child love relationships occur in all combinations (boy-man, boy-woman, girl-man, and girl-woman).

If you want to contribute something to this collection, please contact the editor:
< webmaster@ipce.org >

T. Rivas