Tommy, 20 years old, shared some of his early experiences with an interviewer. What concerns us here, is his relationship with an adult man, Niels. Here are a few of his statements about this relationship.
Interviewer: What attracted you to Niels?
Tommy: I've always done what they say you shouldn't do. Occult and mystical things fascinate me - and gays and child-molesters. I was curious and wanted to find out what it all meant.
At that time I was committing crimes. I got caught and sentenced. I was sent to Randers. I ran away several times - hitchhiked. I always went straight back to Niels. So, I think our relation will continue for many years. I don't think I'll forget Niels until the day one of us dies.
You were in love with Niels?
I wouldn't say that I was in love. I don't think I could ever fall in love with a man. No. I couldn't say that. It was more a question of feeling safe. Niels was the only person I could visit and talk with, whatever was wrong. There were never any inhibitions on my part - probably because we had this intimate relationship with each other.
Could you have had the same confidential relationship if you hadn't gone to bed together?
I don't think so. Strong emotional bonds grow out of it. People think that a child-molester is a big, brutal pig wallowing over a poor little child. But it was not like that. [...]
Did you ever feel it was somehow perverse or bestial to have sex with a man?
I was attracted to it, drawn to it. I thought it was exciting.
You realised it was forbidden, didn't you?
That didn't bother me in the least. It didn't matter to me what adults thought. I had met so many teachers and they always just stood there and talked over my head. I lived in my own world. As long as I was allowed to do the things I thought important for me, the rest didn't matter.
Yes indeed. My father is 57 so I don't have a very good contact with him. My mother is 55. They could never understand me and I could never understand them. We have been running around in opposition to each other for years. My mother has a bad case of nerves because of me.
I've always been obstinate. When I got angry, my aggressive feelings were so strong that I just had to do something. And I couldn't very well beat my mother, could I? So I would smash up my own things as an outlet. This, too, stopped after I got to know Niels.
I stopped with crime after a four month sentence for car theft and burglary. I never did anything like that again.
What did your parents say about your visiting Niels?
They weren't happy about it. I remember that once Niels wanted me to go with him on a trip to Sweden. He came to our house to talk it over it with my mother and father. It was all right - until they heard he was gay. Then they refused to let me go.
I got real mad. I ran away. It was only to get away from home. Without my parents' permission, Niels couldn't take me with him. I was under 15 and it would only have caused problems.
I was already quite independent by then. Nobody could tell me what to do or how to do it, and certainly not my father or mother. The only one I really listened to was Niels.
I was really afraid that the authorities would intervene. A few years ago I didn't want to stay at home any longer, or live with a foster family. The authorities finally accepted it then, and I was allowed to live with Niels.